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I just don't get In Plain Sight

To say that USA Network's latest series is wildly uneven is putting it mildly. It almost seems like it's two different shows (if not for the almost guaranteed-to-be lame subplots revolving around the protagonist's mother, sister, boyfriend [or whatever he is]). On the one hand, you have a light but generally compelling crime drama--as typified by the pilot, "Trojan Horst", and this week's "Iris Doesn't Live Here Anymore." On the other hand, you have credulity stretching episodes like...well, almost the rest of them--"Who Shot Jay Arnstein" and "High Priced Spread" being the most glaring examples of the lack of quality.

"Trojan Horst" is probably the best episode they've aired so far. The always funny Dave Foley did a great job as the snarky lowlife. The writers were able to skirt very cliched situations/conversations and make them work. The episode was capped with one of the best ending scenes I've seen this year--very subtle and powerful acting.

"Iris Doesn't Live Here Anymore" takes a look at the upheaval--personal, familial, professional, etc.--that people in the WitSec program go through when this change of life is thrust upon them. Wendell Price did a great job as the father watching everything he'd worked so hard for slip through his fingers. Whoever played the mother (can't find her name anywhere) did something I'm not used to seeing--out-act Price. And while Mary and Marshall were clearly present and vital to the plot, they weren't the focus--Iris and her family were. Just that small adjustment helped the episode.

Now I just have to hold my breath and see which series shows up next week.

Not Once More, but Still with Feeling

In case you've been living under a rock, or without the Internet for a while, thought I'd mention that at 12:01 am this morning, my Master released the first Act of his latest opus--Doctor Horrible’s Sing-Along Blogwhich crashed his server just a few hours later.

Thankfully, I work graveyard so I go to see it. HA!

It was funny, it was sweet--Neil Patrick Harris is fantastic--and the rest of the cast was pretty good. I thought Simon Helberg was great on Big Bang Theory, but this was better work, IMHO. Nathan Fillon was Nathan Fillion--a good hero (thankfully, Captain Hammer's pants are looser than Mal's).

Assuming the server comes back sometime before Act II on Thursday, check it out, it's worth 13 minutes of your day. Or, just plunk down the $4 to buy the whole thing on iTunes and crash their server.

"I was Robert Downey Jr. of cookies!"

Cookie Monster, Colbert...need I say more?

July 10

Some facebook user came up with a 'holiday' for today: International Hug a Calvinist Day. There are so many problems with that--I mean, just doesn't fit our stereotype (one too often that fits--seriously, go try to hug this Calvinist sometime and see what happens). But hey, it's a nice idea...

A nicer idea tied in with today's date is the Calvin Quincentenary--a celebration commemorating Calvin's 500^th birthday. Some great resources/conferences are going to come out of this--and have already started.

That's right, 499 years ago today in Nyon, France, a little boy named Jean Cauvin was born. He grew up, was converted to Christ and the gospel of grace--abandoned what was surely to have been a profitable career in law and became a minister. His teachings--merely a recovery of Biblical truth--shaped religious, cultural, and political life in countless nations since that time (even giving birth to that little War for Independence we celebrated last week). His impact was probably heightened by the way we changed his name into something less French sounding, John Calvin. Cauvinist just doesn't have the same ring.

It's quite the understatement to say that this man has been used by God to radically alter my own life. More and more it's not his doctrine--well, at least not the stuff he's famous for--that impacts me. It's his piety, it's his love for God, his heart aflame (think there's a book called that by somebody) because of his fame-making doctrine--that's what draws me. I've been telling people in my church (not sure they believe me yet) if you want answers to your theological questions, read Turretin, or Hodge, or Reymond--Berkhoff, too. But if you want your heart moved, then you read Calvin.

You can see a hint of that in these quotations (I could've killed blogger's disk space by posting everything I wanted to):

. . . I consider looseness with words no less of a defect than looseness of the bowels.

For Scripture is the school of the Holy Spirit, in which, as nothing is omitted that is both necessary and useful to know, so nothing is taught but what is expedient to know. Therefore we must guard against depriving believers of anything disclosed about predestination in Scripture, lest we seem either wickedly to defraud them of the blessing of their God or to accuse and scoff at the Holy Spirit for having published what it is in any way profitable to suppress.

For until men recognize that they owe everything to God, that they are nourished by His fatherly care, that He is the Author of their every good, that they should seek nothing beyond Him - they will never yield Him willing service. Nay, unless they establish their complete happiness in Him, they will never give themselves truly and sincerely to Him.

If the Lord himself teaches that the Church will struggle with the burden of countless sinners until the day of judgment, it is obviously futile to look for a Church totally free from faults.

Without Christ, sciences in every department are vain....The man who knows not God is vain, though he should be conversant with every branch of learning. Nay more, we may affirm this too with truth, that these choice gifts of God -- expertness of mind, acuteness of judgment, liberal sciences, and acquaintance with languages, are in a manner profaned in every instance in which they fall to the lot of wicked men.

Doctrine has no power, unless efficacy is imparted to it from above. Christ holds out an example to teachers, not to employ themselves only in sowing the Word, but by mingling prayers with it, to implore the assistance of God, that His blessing may render their labor fruitful.

If we seek salvation, we are taught by the very name of Jesus that it is 'of him' [1 Corinthians 1:30]. If we seek any other gifts of the Spirit, they will be found in his anointing. If we seek strength, it lies in his dominion; if purity, in his conception; if gentleness, it appears in his birth. For by his birth he was made like us in all respects [Hebrews 2:17] that he might learn to feel our pain [cf. Hebrews 5:2]. If we seek redemption, it lies in his passion; if acquittal, in his condemnation; if remission of the curse, in his cross [Galatians 3:13]; if satisfaction, in his sacrifice; if purification, in his blood; if reconciliation, in his descent into hell; if mortification of the flesh, in his tomb; if newness of life, in his resurrection; if immortality, in the same; if inheritance of the Heavenly Kingdom, in his entrance into heaven; if protection, if security, if abundant supply of all blessings, in his Kingdom; if untroubled expectation of judgment, in the power given to him to judge. In short, since rich store of every kind of good abounds in him, let us drink our fill from this fountain, and from no other.

Lord, thank you for your gift of this man, and the work you gave him to do. Soli Deo Gloria.

(picture taken from Reformation Art--great products, btw!)

Chasing Darkness by Robert Crais

I was able to steal 10 minutes here and there, and was able to finish Elvis Cole's latest adventure. This is the best Cole in years (The Watchman, technically a Joe Pike novel, doesn't count).

Pike is Pike (Hawk to the 3rd power); Elvis is still the less-funny, more-broody of the later novels; the nameless cat is still the nameless cat, and the regular supporting cast is at least mentioned.

The status remains quo with Elvis' relationships with Carol and Lucy. Elvis won't let go of Lucy, who is trying to distance herself from him (with a degree of success). Carol's still hung up on Elvis, but seems in more control of her emotions. I've liked Starkey in every one of her appearances, this time, perhaps more than others.

Crais was near the top of his game when it came to plotting--I suspected the culprit early on, but it was still well plotted. What appealed to me most about this was that what drew Elvis into the case wasn't something in his personal history, a friend's past, Pike's past, etc. Yes, there was a historical draw--but it was professional, making this a case of Elvis finishing a job, not exploring what made him who he is today, etc.

The ending was also pleasantly small. There was no apocalyptic battle between Elvis, Pike and several gunmen, or whatever. A simple, solid resolution. Yes, something that resonated, something that read well and contained the requisite suspense...just not an 'end of the world' scenario.

Sadly, have to wait another year for the next installment--but am sure it'll be worth it.

The Answer's in the Question

While checking my hotmail account a couple of times today, I kept noticing a stupid little feature on their "MSN Today" tab--which I must confess, I do scan every time I log on...5% of the time, they have something moderately interesting to read there. This one really bugged me for some reason:

I'm thinking the answer really is "Those Who Take Time to Vote on This"


(and no, I didn't click it, so can't tell you what's really winning)

"Go to hell, I'm reading."

Sorry for the profanity, blame Mrs. Goodwin for not teaching her little Archie better.

That's both one of my favorite lines from the Nero Wolfe corpus (from Fer-de-Lance) and what I'm so dying to say to the world.

I've got Robert Crais' new book, Chasing Darkness an arm's length from me. Unopened. That's a crime worthy of Elvis Cole's attention in an of itself. I've got one other novel and one nonfiction work that I've gotten far enough into that I want to finish them soon. One other nonfiction work waiting in the wings. And...

But alas, I have kids needing to be schooled (ironically, they spend more time reading than I do...all part of my custom "Do as I Say, Not as I Do" curriculum), kids needing to be played with, chores to be done, a shift to put in (depending how alert I feel, I might get an hour or so of reading in tonight), a wife to talk to, etc. All of which I love to do, don't get me wrong (well, except folding laundry...).

But, oh for one day...where I could just tell everyone and everything, "Go to hell, I'm reading."

Not Gomer Pyle's Catchphrase

I know not all of you read comics, but for the few of you who do regularly/occasionally, let me heartily recommend Billy Batson and the Magic of Shazam! #1. The splash page rightly credits Mike Kunkel with "pictures, words & heart"--this looks and feels like a labor of love.

From the great animation-style drawings, to the clever plot, to the horribly-detailed and annoying coded-intro pages, to the use of the old "Solomon=Wisom, Hercules=strength.... acronym; this was a fun, clever, well-written book.

It seems to be marketed like a DCKids title, but it's produced better than the rest of that line--and it's technically not one; but it is for "all ages" (something far to rare in comics these days, even from The Big Two). I enjoyed it, and am sure the Offspring will, too.

The Struggle Continues

The liberties so brilliantly enumerated and bravely won, are in peril today. Attacked by those who are in direct opposition to them, ignored by the complacent, and undermined by well-intentioned societal reformers of every stripe, it is the duty of every citizen of this nation to continue to support that Declaration, still relying on the protection of divine Providence. The Spirit of '76 still lives.

Remembering (and/or learning) what happened to the signers of the original Declaration should inspire us in this.

In that vein, I'd encourage you to check out a special webcast this coming Lord's Day.

Dr. Richard Bacon will preach from Luke 22:38 and other Scriptures on the topic "Thanksgiving For The God-Given Right To Bear Arms." This topic is in celebration both of the Supreme Court decision in District of Columbia v. Heller and the fact that Friday is the 232nd anniversary of the Declaration of American Independence from Great Britain.

Given the reaction from some corners of Evangelicalism to this decision (for example), Bacon's sermon will likely be a very timely help.

Naturally, the wise Rosie, reminds us today of the more vital definition of freedom.

232 Years Later

IN CONGRESS, July 4, 1776.

The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America,

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.--Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.

He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good. He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them. He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only. He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures. He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people. He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected; whereby the Legislative powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within. He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands. He has obstructed the Administration of Justice, by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary powers. He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone, for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries. He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harrass our people, and eat out their substance. He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures. He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil power. He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation: For Quartering large bodies of armed troops among us: For protecting them, by a mock Trial, from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States: For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world: For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent: For depriving us in many cases, of the benefits of Trial by Jury: For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies: For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws, and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments: For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever. He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us. He has plundered our seas, ravaged our Coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people. He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation. He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands. He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages, whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.

In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.

Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our Brittish brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which, would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

Science Fiction, Gender Balance, Marxism/Collectivism and My Kind of Male Chauvanist

I really need to spend time editing these post titles...

Whilst trying to come up with something to post today, I made a mistake--I read something great. Sometimes reading something I appreciate will inspire me, other times it'll just intimidate me. Today, I was intimidated, I read two posts that were thought-provoking, skillfully argued, with some killer lines...oh, and they had the added bonus of being right.

John C. Wright is one of my favorite living science fiction writers, even tho I have yet to really get into one of his novels. But I love reading his blog, and trust that one day, I'll appreciate his fiction. Yesterday, he responded to an online panel discussion about gender balance in genre fiction with two great posts, "Gender Balance in Genre Fiction" and "The Coldness of the Heretics." Even if you don't care about Science Fiction publishing (or genre publishing in general), they're worth the read.

In the first post, he talked about his own position, and pointed to a take he appreciated (as did I). Am sure he's correct when he said, "I doubt this will be the most popular response." But his explanation for his doubt is phrased perfectly: "In an age when thin-skinned whining is regarded as a moral good, stoicism is regarded as unethical." (gotta get that one committed to memory for future use)

In his last four paragraphs he gives a summary of what it is to act like a man--not unlike Brad Miner's view, just put in a pithier manner. In short, "If male chauvinists like me really want to be male chauvinists, we have to be male chivilrists as well, in which case we cannot treat womanhood with other than courtesy and fearful reverence."

In Wright's second post, he really lets loose, reacting to a comment to the panel, which stated in part:

I would argue that to consciously embrace and celebrate the dominant culture through an act of writing, editing or publishing - or even reviewing/acknowledging -- knowing the inequities and injustices that the dominant culture is built on, is an unethical act that perpetuates the worst of that culture's inequities and injustices.

Wright responds:

I hope the disproportionate absurdity of the sentiment expressed speaks for itself (it is an unethical act to review or acknowledge a book complimentary to Western values, because the West is built on evil. So don’t review STAR WARS or acknowledge STAR TREK because Virginian planters kept black slaves, the Romans conquered the Gauls, and the Homo Sapiens wiped out the Neanderthals).

I hope the illogic involved is likewise obvious (Only within the ethical context of Western values, Judo-Christian and Greco-Roman ideals of justice, individualism, and pity for the underdog, it is regarded as an evil to side with one’s forefathers against the stranger or sojourner when one’s forefathers are arguably in the wrong. Oriental ethical systems make patriotism and family loyalty paramount. The Muslim has a broader standard, since Islam is a universalist religion, but no pity is obligated for the infidel, but instead, a positive obligation to war, to pillage and to conquer. Hence, we cannot reject the West except from Progressive philosophical ground; but Progressivism is unique to the West, a heresy of the Enlightenment, so to speak, that can grow out of no other intellectual tradition.)

So seeing no need to dwell further on the lack of proportion and the lack of logic, I should like to emphasize the dismal coldheartedness of the world-view expressed. I submit that it is an inhuman world view.

Wright follows that with a 2400-word worldview apologetic against "that inhuman worldview" (Marxism/collectivism) that he'd do well to expand and publish (as well as cleaning up the typo 'Judo-Christian', as fun an idea as that is)--he attacks Marxism on political, moral, and aesthetic grounds.

Wright's well worth your time, particularly on these two posts.

Reason #546 Why I Hate Local News...

My iGoogle is set to give me the latest headlines from Idaho's largest newspaper, a feed which is occasionally almost useful. Usually, not so much. For example, I just logged on to read, "Boise police to step up patrols to target drunken drivers during July 4th weekend." How is this news? Haven't the Boise police (like every other police dept. in the U.S.A.) been doing this every year since Candice Lightner got started (if not before)? What would be newsworthy is if the Boise police decided to sit out one holiday weekend.

But that wasn't the worst excuse for 'news' I saw posted on the paper's website today. No, sir. It was this piece:

Police go undercover on dog poop patrol

Boise police tried to crack down on dog owners who flout the city's dog leash and poop pickup laws Tuesday, but an early-morning rain storm apparently kept many away from the parks.

Four citations were issued in the first two and a half hours of the focused patrol, according to Boise Police Sgt. Paul Burch, who leads the neighborhood contact officer unit. They began observing park users at about 7:30 a.m.

I'm not sure how this last sentence helps the story much, save getting the writer a few characters closer to her word-target.

The eight neighborhood officers who targeted North End parks were in plain clothes to avoid tipping off the scofflaws.

"in plain clothes to avoid tipping off the scofflaws" was included for all those readers confused by the term "undercover" in the headline. No, the police weren't in dog costumes, they were dressed as dog owners.

"The truth of the matter is ... people actually get out of their cars, look around with their dogs on leash, then they unclip them and let them run amok," Burch said.

Members of the group Boise Trail DOG and regular users of the Foothills, including North End resident Jodi Peterson, have been trying to educate dog owners about their responsibilities.

A week and a half ago, Peterson announced a new leash-lending program that would make leashes available at kiosks at a half dozen trailheads.

For dog owners who don't want to go to the bother of buying a leash, congrats! You now know where to steal one!

Burch said police did a focused patrol Tuesday because of the volume of complaints recently about people letting their dogs off leash in leash-only areas and not picking up dog poop.

He noted that annual community surveys show that dog issues are a top concern among Boise residents.

Translation: Life in Boise is pretty good.

Boise police's bike patrol issued 83 off-leash dog citations in city parks and along the Greenbelt last year. That's a five-year low in annual citations issued, according to police data. There were 141 citations issued in 2005.

Burch speculated that more citations were issued in 2005 because more people complained that year.

I'm going to give Sgt. Burch credit for not being this clueless and chalk up this fairly obvious bit of observation (sorry, "speculation") to the way it was written.

"Complaints drive our enforcement," Burch said. "If we get a lot of complaints about something, we respond to the needs of the community."

The fine for each violation in city parks is $25 plus court costs, bringing the total to $66.50.

Anywhere else in the city, a dog at large violation is a misdemeanor, which means dog owners are summoned to court. The penalty is set by the judge.

Zet Castets, a North End resident who regularly walks her dog at Camel's Back Park, noticed that there were four or five piles of dog poop in the grassy area of the park Tuesday.

What are we to conclude about Ms. Castets here? Has she spent too much time in Camel's Back Park to note the natural beauty? Maybe she should switch to another park to walk her dog. Or maybe she's Camel's Back Park's version of Gladys Kravitz.

She keeps her waistpack stuffed with green dog poop bags to clean up after her 3 year old dog, an Australian shepherd-border collie mix named Voyou (French for "little rascal").

Clearly, the writer (name withheld to protect the guilty) is just going for word volume here, not content. Who cares what the dog's name is? How is that relevant? And the French translation? That's just showing off--not unlike "scofflaw" above--the latter I didn't mind, actually appreciated the atypical vocabulary, but "French for 'little rascal'"? Puh-leez.

"Some are responsible, but not everybody," said Castets, a native of France who has lived in Boise for the past couple years. "Some people don't pay attention. They don't care. We all have to do our share."

And as she said that, Gung-Ho and Duke from G.I. Joe came up behind Ms. Castets and said, "And now you know." To which she replied "And knowing's half the battle." The three all laughed and the article ended.

Or something like that.

How Have I Not Read This Before?

Just started Gatto's The Underground History of American Education--have seen it cited, quoted, lauded several times over the years, but have yet to pick it up.

Today, I took my first dip into the prologue. Wow! Am loving this already (am pretty hard-line on this issue already, this could turn me into a frothing at the mouth lunatic)

You aren't complelled to loan your car to anyone who wants it, but you are compelled to surrender your school-age child to strangers who process children for a livlihood, eeven though one in every nine schoolchildren is terrified of physical harm happeneing to them in school...Your great-great-grandmother didn't have to surrender her children. What happened?

If I demanded you give up your television to an anonymous, itinerant repairman who needed work you'd think I was crazy; if I came with a policeman who forced you to pay that repairman even after he broke your set--you would be outraged. Why are you so docile when you give up your child to a government agent called a school teacher?

So Where Have I Been?

After two and a half months of just about daily posting, I vanish for a week. What gives?

Well, y'see...last Saturday, we buried my Grandma ("G.G" to the Offspring), and then I spent the rest of the weekend with my sister, mother, cousins, aunts, and occasionally uncles/father/wife packing up her house.

And I spent the last week wanting to write about that, not quite able to, but not feeling free to do anything else. Not sure what's changed given the passage of a mere 8 days, but...something has, I guess.

Normal posting shall resume.

So Glad I Don't Live 40 Miles West of Here

HotAir relates the dreadful story of Barbara Wagner from Oregon:

Oregon’s state-run health care plan won’t cover a new drug that could extend her life — which is, after all, the entire point of health insurance and health care — but will gladly pay the bill if she decides to stop costing the state more money.

Wagner is, of course, not the first or only one who's experienced this

local oncologists say they’ve seen a change and that their Oregon Health Plan patients with advanced cancer no longer get coverage for chemotherapy if it is considered comfort care.

Ed Morrissey's analysis is spot-on:

This is the entirely predictable result of the shift in thinking of human life as sacred to an entirely materialistic view. Human life becomes a commodity, especially when the state has charge of it and responsibility for its costs. When the state assumes the cost for the most personal and private functions of its citizens, the private and personal become public, and the limits of government disappear.

Do you like French fries? Those cause heart disease, which costs the government X billions of dollars per year, so those are out. How about tanning booths? Skin cancer treatments cost $X billions, too, so we’ll outlaw those. Finally, so what if you want to extend your life an extra couple of years? You can’t generate enough revenue to make up for the cost of the treatment, so the state won’t allow it. If you’d be so kind as to drop dead now, though, that will save some money for a badly-needed sex-change operation.

For those who are too lazy to read the link, there is a happy ending. Genentech, the pharmecutical company who makes the drug she needs, is going to give her a one-year supply (at least). Imagine that...someone putting medicine in the hands of the ill...how is that too complicated for the state? Oh wait...they're too busy making sure people don't pump their own gas...

Ohhhh, I'm a lousy parent

Just got done watching tonight's Doctor Who on SciFi ("Silence in the Library") with TLomL and the Offspring. Then tucked the Princess and Arnold in to bed. What's Arnold muttering as I leave the room?

Hey, who turned out the lights? Hey, who turned out the lights? Hey, who turned out the lights? Hey, who turned out the lights?...*

* yeah, yeah, I know there's only like 3 of you that get why my 4 year old saying that is funny/disturbing...but you 3 really get it

Knew I Should've Gone to Law School

Just didn't realize I should've done it before I became a dad...

A Canadian court has lifted a 12-year-old girl's grounding, overturning her father's punishment for disobeying his orders to stay off the internet, his lawyer said today.

The girl had taken her father to Quebec Superior Court after he refused to allow her to go on a school trip for chatting on websites he tried to block, and then posting "inappropriate" pictures of herself online using a friend's computer.

The father's lawyer Kim Beaudoin said the disciplinary measures were for the girl's "own protection" and is appealing the ruling.

If your stomach is strong enough, the rest of the story is here at The Brisbane Times' site.

As kletois said when he showed me this piece

if you are in Canada heres a helpful tip: GET OUT

"...and pants to match."

I wasn't sure what I was going to talk about tonight--maybe the nasty-sounding, un-appealing looking, uber-expensive "The Burger" from Burger King in London--but, darn it all, it was going to be something wordy...but then I'm doing my typical check o' the ol' blogs, and Alan Sepinwall throws a monkey wrench into that by throwing up links to some of the best Newsradio clips on youtube. I watched this first one so many times I probably just about crashed the site, laughing the whole time.

I apparently missed this episode in syndication, but oh man...now I have to track it down...why doesn't Vicki Lewis get more work? Why won't Tierney get out of that drab drama and get back to comedy? And Dick? ohhhh man...

The Princess and the Fish

My father continued his efforts to introduce my children to that scary thing called nature yesterday by convincing The Princess to play hooky and go fishing (wasn't that hard to convince). She'd never been before, so this was a pretty big deal. We were all pretty glad to see her go--sadly, not because we were glad she got the experience, but because from the time she got up until she was picked up, she made sure to announce to whoever was near, "I'm going fishing!" every five minutes or so (maybe every three).

She, her cousin, and Grandpa (or, as Arnold has taken to calling him "Grond-paw") seemed to have a pleasant time, and on the whole were able to enjoy sitting by the edge of the river uninterrupted by removing fish from hooks. Thankfully, they weren't totally skunked--the Princess was able to bring in this bluegill (if I was better with GIMP, I'd doctor the photo just to help her ego in years to come when she pulls this photo out. I just hope she realizes that not every fishing trip will be this exciting and eventful.

'Bout Sums It Up for Me

Once again, Greg Dean over at Real Life Comics puts my thoughts into words and art for me...

Mr. Monk in Outer Space

If I had more energy, I'd go through the archives and see how many of Lee Goldberg's Monk novels I've talked about, but I'm pretty sure my take on all of them is pretty much the same: theyyyyy're grrreaaat! The latest, just released in paperback (making it cheap enough for Frodo to give it to me for Father's Day) is no exception.

Essentially, the novel centers on the death of the creator of a Star Trek-like show at a con. Monk has a hard time understading the obsessive nature of the fans and is convinced these adults walking around in costumes are tripping on acid. Hilarity ensues. Goldberg is able to spoof fandom, TV reimaginings, not to mention TV in general. He doesn't do so meanly, there's respect, affection, and understanding. Which is a pleasant change--normally fanboys are painted with the broadest brush in these circumstances and played for only cheap laughs, Goldberg resists this impulse (generally), which results in better jokes.

Outer Space's mystery holds up a little better than it's fore-runners, but as with the show, the mystery is secondary to watching Monk navigate through society--particularly one as strange as SciFi fandom. I laughed out loud a lot at this one--but it was more than just a comedic romp. There were some good, more serious, moments that really get ya in the cockles----as they do in the TV episodes featuring Ambrose (oh, did I forget to mention that Ambrose makes his first appearance in the books? Silly me). They, along with Monk's final appraisal of fandom, really elevate the book.

Another solid outing for Goldberg--his best yet, actually. Can't wait for the next installment.

Father's Day

We celebrated Father's Day at La Maison Newton yesterday, and I felt a little embarrassed at how well I was treated. Typical for us, it was low key day with little fanfare, but what little fare we had was well fanned. (or was the fan well fared?) TLomL strained my waistband with a couple of special meals, and I got some decent quality time in with the kids. Particularly with Frodo, who finally talked me into teaching him how to play Risk. It took me three hours to finally wipe him off the board (there was at least one point where I feared he'd do the same to me), and turn him into an addict. And I have to mention the cake the boys picked out for me (pictured to the left)--visually great, and just the perfect level of lightness--I could've eaten three of those and not noticed.

The gifts from my kids were the best kind--those that showed their personality, as well as showing a good deal of thoughtfulness. For example, Arnold gave me a new watch--something I've needed for about 2 years--it looks just like Frodo's, only bigger (I think he's hoping I can get to be as cool as his idol). TLomL gave me The Traveling Wilburys' box set--a true sacrifice on her part, and one her ears probably regretted within a couple of hours (and not just because I can't help singing all the Dylan parts...she's just lucky I don't think I can do a George Harrison or Roy Orbison impression). It'll be worse for her when all four of the kids are singing "The End of the Line" by Friday...what we do for love, eh?

But really, as great a day as they gave me, yesterday was just the cap to a week where everyone doted on me. My wife was there for me every step of the way through the surgery and recovery. Everyone reacts a little differently to anesthesia--I apparently become an antagonistic jerk (a couple of you are wondering how anyone could tell), but she was there, with a lot more patience than I deserved. After that, she was loving and supportive through incredible discomfort and intense pain--from her expression it sometimes seemed she felt it more than I did. My kids all went above and beyond the call both in help and understanding.

I gave Samwise and Frodo a pretty good description of what happened to me, and what I was going through in recovery. Thursday, I had to do something that at least sounded quite unpleasant, and I was having a hard time getting in the right place mentally to give it a shot (not to mention physically). Both of them were right there with to encourage me. They fed me my own words in a heckuva 1-2 punch combination. Frodo kept telling me, "You know you have to do it." And Sam would follow up with, "If you do it now, you won't have to worry about it later." Not only were they inconveniently right, but they were sincere. In another five years or so, their words would be tinged with sarcasm and mockery, and I'd have felt justified in my desire to strangle them. In their earnestness, I knew such was an over-reaction.

I know the idea of the idea of the day is to make money for Hallmark and assorted companies honor fathers, but really, being dad to this group is honor enough.

Shuffle Up and Improvise

In the tradition of This is Spinal Tap, Best of Show, A Mighty Wind, etc. comes the improvised mockumentary The Grand directed and co-written by Zak Penn, who pays off some of the great debt he owes movies for Elektra and X-Men: The Last Stand.

The film centers on a motley bunch of competitors in a 10 million dollar poker tournament. And, um...well, come to think of it, that's pretty much it. Penn's reportedly a big poker player, and recruited some of the best of Hollywood's players to be in the film--and Phil Gordon, poker commentator to-boot (gets some of the best lines). The players include: David Cross, Judy Greer, Woody Harrelson, Gabe Kaplan, Richard Kind, Cheryl Hines, Michael McKean, Chris Parnell, Ray Romano, and Dennis Farina (always fun to see him to comedy). Those are more than enough to fill 104 minutes--but the film manages to pack in even more.

I really want to go on about this, but really that's all there is to say. Strange characters, well-to-brilliantly played; poker; an overall plot that holds up better than Christopher Guest's flicks; and say 100 minutes of laughs (pretty sure there've gotta be 4 minutes of dead time...maybe up to 8).

Windmills are Still Standing

For all his tilting, all too many windmills are still standing. But Ron Paul dropped out of the race last night. This Don Quixote did create many a faithful Sancho Panza, and will continue the work in the Campaign for Liberty.

Never fear, I'm dropping that metaphor before I stretch it even thinner--just gonna say, go check the Campaign out, get involved.

Freedom is not defined by safety. Freedom is defined by the ability of citizens to live without government interference. Government cannot create a world without risks, nor would we really wish to live in such a fictional place. Only a totalitarian society would even claim absolute safety as a worthy ideal, because it would require total state control over its citizens’ lives. Liberty has meaning only if we still believe in it when terrible things happen and a false government security blanket beckons.

In the final analysis, the last line of defense in support of freedom and the Constitution consists of the people themselves. If the people want to be free, if they want to lift themselves out from underneath a state apparatus that threatens their liberties, squanders their resources on needless wars, destroys the value of their dollar, and spews forth endless propaganda about how indispensable it is and how lost we would all be without it, there is no force that can stop them.

Oh, Fer Cryin' Out Loud!

OCEANSIDE, Calif. — On a Monday morning last month, highway patrol officers visited 20 classrooms at El Camino High School to announce some horrible news: Several students had been killed in car wrecks over the weekend.

Classmates wept. Some became hysterical.

A few hours and many tears later, though, the pain turned to fury when the teenagers learned that it was all a hoax — a scared-straight exercise designed by school officials to dramatize the consequences of drinking and driving.

FOXNews has the rest.

This is simply stupid. How is this not going to blow up in their faces?

Now I've Seen Everything

Okay, I thought the whole 'unicorn' deer thing that was all over 'teh InterWeb' yesterday was strange enough...but this just takes the cake.

A piglet scared of wallowing in mud has overcome its fears with the help of some Wellington boots.

Six-week-old Cinders appears to suffer from mysophobia, a fear of dirt, after refusing to join her siblings as they splashed around in the mud.

Owner Andrew Keeble from Thirsk, North Yorks, said his daughter Ellie, 12, suggested kitting her out in the tiny footwear which had been on a key ring.

Click the link there for more details from BBC, including video.

The Baseball Finals

Doesn't he look tough there?

Finally, getting around to talking about Samwise's Little League Tourney. Sorry for the delay, life and stuff interrupted. So the team entered the tournament having finished the season in First Place--and, Sam wasn't a small part of that (wasn't a huge part, don't get me wrong, but he's was a role player), so they got a bye for the first game and the lowest seeded team for the second game. Which basically served as batting practice for the team--although there was a moment or two where it looked like the other guys could make it interesting. Sam's coach spent the week walking the tightrope between an intense desire to win and trying to keep things fun for the kids--he succeeded for the most part, but came close to running the kids ragged with practices on top of their games. If it wasn't the end of the season, it'd have been cruel. Then came Saturday--the big day. 2 games guaranteed--one more elimination game for the four remaining teams and then either the consolation game or the championship game. The team they faced first (at 8:30 in the morning! How mean!) was no slouch--finished the season in a close fourth. This was everything that a parent/fan/coach/player could've wanted. Some decent defense (great defense for this level, if you grade on a curve), great offense, dumb young kid mistakes...a real nail-biter for too much of the game. In the end, Sam's team won and the 4th place team went to the consolation game (they ended up winning in an offensive slugfest, at one point it was 17-14 and they played a couple more long innings after that). So we get a few hours off (nap time for the dad who came straight from work for the early game). Thankfully, the second place team ended up in the championship game with them--the third place team had beaten Sam's team twice and had this psychological hold on them, and would've likely won. Sadly, they were hurt by illnesses (flu, pneumonia, etc.)--one player in the second game wasn't feeling good enough to play in the first of the day. They had enough to field a team, but had no bench to draw from. This game wasn't as good--both teams were tired (Sam's had a couple more hours of rest tho), neither team's big hitters were able to do as much as they wanted to, which was frustrating to all. The end of this game was never in any real doubt--thankfully. The lack of bench came into play towards the end--in the penultimate inning, the "big gun" on Sam's team hit this monster line-drive right into the face of the girl playing pitcher. She got a small cut by her eye, a bloody nose and a trip to the ER (seemed okay, but parent's were being understandably paranoid). The game really ended right there, although another full inning was played. Typically, the parents on the losing team took it harder than their kids--on the whole, the parents on the winning side muted our celebrations because of the injury (the players really didn't...breaking into an impromptu cover of "We are the Champions" shortly after congratulating the other team). Then there was the award ceremony--and, like I mentioned the other day, Samwise now has a trophy that had nothing to do with participation. An actual trophy, signifying an actual accomplishment and victory. Couldn't bee prouder. Of course the thought that occupied my mind for the rest of the day was..."what nimrod spends 6 hours at a baseball field without a cap on a sunny day?" OW!!

Why Politicians Scare Me

From Politico:

Rep. Jesse Jackson Jr. (D-Ill.), son of the one-time presidential contender, said Obama’s victory overwhelmed him.

"I cried all night. I’m going to be crying for the next four years," he said. "What Barack Obama has accomplished is the single most extraordinary event that has occurred in the 232 years of the nation’s political history. ... The event itself is so extraordinary that another chapter could be added to the Bible to chronicle its significance." (emphasis mine)

from John Stossel:

Parents aren't responsible enough? The politicians need to make these decisions for them?

[Mayor Robert Correia of Fall River, Mass.] replied, "Parents do have a chance to decide that through their elected officers. That's what a democracy is all about."

Really? I had no idea democracy was about voting on who gets to tell you how to raise your kids.

Well, that's that

Back home now, and feeling surprisingly well. Had the rudest post-op nurse. Refused to really answer any of my questions, ignored what I said about how I felt, kept telling me I wouldn't remember any of what she said, no matter how coherent I told her I was (I think the fact I was using coherent correctly within a minute from coming out of the general should've got me a little consideration).

Oh, and, as for not remembering anything? I could give a pretty accurate transcript right now--not Archie Goodwin verbatim level, but pretty close.

If I keep feeling the way I am, the biggest challenges that face me are keeping the diet restrictions (can't eat for 8 hours before and 24 hrs after! good gravy!) and finding some way past the sentry tonight to make it to work.

I Don't Like Mondays

(really, have no problem with Mondays, but am listening to this for no apparent reason as I type, and it seems to fit. Go ahead and open it in a new tab and listen as you read.)

I know I've made a couple of references over the last few months to having kidney stones for the second time in 12 years (am shooting for 22 this next time...), but honestly, I wasn't that sure it was what was going on, because as dim as my memory was I remember it being more than just very uncomfortable-to-moderately painful--which is all it had gotten to. But my urologist had a CT scan performed, and did a cystoscopy a couple weeks back and found "a really big one, maybe two" stuck along the way. And don't think a cystoscopy isn't twice as much fun as it sounds like.

And then the next day that pain I remembered, that Life Changing pain, the pain that let me know with a certainty no CT scan could ever give, kicked in. Spent a few hours in the ER on some sort of cocktail of miracle drugs, thanks to the insistence of TLomL. But that/those little sucker(s) have stuck around.

Fast-forward a week and a half, and I'm back for a follow-up. We're supposed to talk about "surgical options"--for me there is no option, it's not a matter of "if," but of "when." The good doctor actually tried to convince me that it was the right move--as I'm sure he has to do that a lot, but after 3.5 months, I didn't need that. He started to get the picture and asked how next week worked for me--I said fine, unless he was free that afternoon.

Then he really got the picture.

So, assuming everything goes according to schedule, about right now, I'll be well under the spell of a general anesthetic so that I can undergo the following four things: a ureteroscopy, a laser lithotripsy, stone extraction (that's the good part), and probably the insertion of a stint.

At first I was just happy that it was ending--after a couple of hours I started to get a little worried and am not so much looking forward it. Perhaps...just perhaps, I shouldn't have looked up those fun words on google, eh? (especially the article with nice color photos). With my liver biopsy 2 yrs ago...I was just stupid to not think it through, but in retrospect, it was good I didn't think about the fact that part of an organ was being ripped out. But not thinking it through spared me a lot of fretting.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not worried worried, just mildly-concerned worried. That, and, not-at-all-looking-forward-to-the-recovery worried.

If I don't stop rambling soon, the whole thing'll be over before you get a chance to finish reading. See you on the flip side :)

Down Time

The Little League season ended last week, which I figured signaled that our lives were going to get back to our regular pace--and then had one of those weeks.*

Anyway, this weekend is the first since sometime in March that has been baseball-free. Actually, it's been totally free: nowhere to go, no one to see, nothing to do. And, that's pretty much all we've done--nothing. We've been home. It's been very refreshing, but a little dull.

Most of us have been home anyway--Frodo's off camping with my parents, sister, and pretty much everyone from my father's side of the family. Not sure when it was that we stopped getting invited as a whole, but Frodo was apparently picked to stand in for the rest of us, and was the only one invited. From the silence of our phones, there's no cell-signal where they are, and TLomL is starting to go crazy from the silence from her first-born. Watching her deal with this three-day separation really makes me dread what'll happen in 9 years when he moves out. **

That's not to say we've done absolutely nothing around here. Last night, Samwise unlocked a new character on Mario Kart Wii, and, um...we've re-assigned seats around the dining table. It's remarkable how such a slight little thing can really throw off everyone. Meals have been surprisingly lively. I do wonder if this alteration is going to be the tipping point for Frodo's latent OCD upon his return.

Anyway, that's it from the Newton Household--a much-deserved dull time. Tomorrow I've got something scheduled to post that's the opposite of dull--at least for me (here's a quick teaser: it involved lasers!! oooh, you really want to read it now, don't ya?)

* Been meaning to write something up on that...the fact that I haven't should say a lot about the week. Short version, Samwise has a trophy on the mantle that has nothing to do with participation.
** I realize that by talking about him moving out one day that I've earned a week on the couch.

Swearing Off Cusack

That's it, I can't take it anymore. John Cusack is one of my all time favorite actors--top five, at least. I can't think of a single thing he's done that I couldn't/haven't watched multiple times (which is why I've avoided a few of his projects--like Max, 'cuz I don't want to feel any sympathy for that particular failed Austrian artist depicted in the film, and 1408 because I don't want to enjoy that kind of movie). But I'm going to have to stop watching his movies now, that's all there is to it.

Well, maybe I'm being rash--maybe I can just swear off all films with him and kids, that might be the way to go. If he's a record shop owner, a hitman with a crisis of conscience, a high school kid sturggling to make the team and get the girl (okay, okay, he's probably not going to make anymore movies like that) and so on--I can take it. But when he's a dad--like in The Martian Child or Grace is Gone (the last two things I've seen him in)...forget it, I just can't do it, I just don't like crying at movies that much.

Grace is Gone is not a great movie, in many ways, it's not even a really good movie. But it has three stellar performances--those by Cusack and the two girls who play his daughters. Shélan O'Keefe and Gracie Bdenarczyk are so good it's scary.

The movie's about the human cost of war, the grief, the loss, the lives. And it's just gut-wrenching. The performances of the three leads are perfect. Subtle, nuanced, careful, and...perfect. Can't think of another word. This movie could be a rival for the Turing test--if you're not moved by Cusack (much less O'Keefe) throughout, or by any of the three in the film's climax, you're a machine. Simple as that.

I should also add that Clint Eastwood's simple score is deceptively so, and captures the essence of the film in a way too few scores do. I think this is the first time Eastwood's written for a film he hasn't directed, but it proves that any time he wants to stop acting and just sit in front of a piano, he can keep busy.

Will on Colbert

This had me in stitches. I think Will gets the better lines, but typically, they're so dry they're easy to miss.

Warning: Enlarged Right Parahippocampal Gyrus Ahead!

No, really.

The New York Times reports today (and yet, it's likely true) that neuropsychologist Katherine P. Rankin's located the part of the brain that perceives sarcasm: the right parahippocampal gyrus. I can only imagine how much my "rpg" is working most of the time compared to say, the part of the brain that remembers how many pints there are to a quart or what the capital of Genosha is.

Give it a read, it's actually interesting and potentially practical. (seriously)

Obviously, starting tomorrow, we'll be doing what we can to stimulate growth in that part of the brain of The Offspring, so they can finally understand what their father is saying.

Jobamania Gets Hit with a Dose of Reality

Joba Chamberlin, the great hope of the Yankees (for the next 15 years), got his first start tonight. Didn't see it televised, but caught the second inning on MLB's Gameday. Ouch. Over 2.1 innings he threw 62 pitches (38 in the first inning!)/32 strikes, 4 walks, 3 K's, 1 balk (!), 1 hit, 2 runs, ERA of 2.43.

I knew the kid was going to have rough times ahead of him...was just hoping it wouldn't be his first inning. I fully trust he's going to bounce back after this, and won't turn this chance into another fiasco like Kennedy and Hughes made of April (still have trust in those guys, too...not sure why).

Meanwhile, Kyle Farnsworth is well on his way to make sure that Yankee fans everywhere miss Joba in every 8th inning for the rest of the season.

Is Roger Clemens serious about retirement?

Give or Take 202

No, not talking about how close a certain Senator is claiming the delegate count for nomination to be, I've got something far more serious in mind.

In 1970, a certain Mr. Owl claimed it took a-one, a-two, a-three licks to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Tootsie Pop. But just five minutes ago, in a totally unscientific study, my son, code-named Samwise for the purposes of this blog, counted 205.

So, there you go--the latest in public service findings from those of us at White Noise: It takes 205 licks to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Tootsie Pop.*



You're more than welcome. We're here to serve.


* +/- 202

Numb or Check This Out--Matthew Perry Can Act!

I don't know about you, but when I hear things like "unconventional romantic comedy" I lose almost all interest immediately, because generally the first convention they "un" is the funny. But because Perry's really only done one unwatchable thing (The Whole Ten Yards)--er, two (Almost Heroes)--and the premise seemed interesting enough that I could ignore the whole "unconventional rom-com" thing.

So here's the deal: Perry plays a guy named Hudson, who's half of a screenwriting team. The other half is Kevin Pollack's Tom. Pollack gets underused, criminally so--but I'm not going to complain too much. He looks like he's had some work done, and just looks wrong--he looked more natural in the aforementioned Ten Yards. Hudson suffers from acute depersonalization disorder, to the best of my knowledge, Perry nails it. As far as I know, I've never met anyone with the disorder, but Perry acts like I'd imagine someone would who feels like he's an outside observer of his mental processes and body--and, I guess, for a movie, that's good enough.

Thanks to the disorder Hudson's struggling with family issues (altho' they'd be around without the disorder), his work is suffering, and enter the romance. From her list of credits on IMDB, I've seen Lynn Collins a handful of times, but honestly, I don't remember any of them. This one, I think I'll remember. She's good in this, as the sweet gal who falls for a very unlikeable guy in a pretty serious way (reminds me of a certain someone). Hudson's so smitten he tries to get serious about treatment. He sees a series of therapists--most of whom would make people want to dig up Freud's corpse and kick it around awhile.

One such therapist--the best in treating depersonalization, supposedly--is Mary Steenburgen's Cheryl Blaine. No reflection on her, but Steenburgen's part is the weakest thing in the film. The label on my Netflix envelope describes her as "libidinous," which works about as well as describing Robin William's as "hirsute." Thankfully, she's just a blip to the story.

On the whole, I wouldn't classify this as a ha-ha comedy, but it does have it's moments. Nevertheless, this does fall into my "unconventional" rule of thumb. Frankly, it shouldn't have been marketed that way. It's not the strongest story, and honestly, when considered, it's not the most clever or inventive. But Hudson's a different kind of character, and Perry just nails it. For anyone wondering whether Perry's more than some goof from sitcom-land, this is the proof.

The Perry thing really doesn't surprise me, what did surprise me was that this film came from the pen of Harris Goldberg, whose past work included such great films as Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo (and the European sequel), Without a Paddle, The Master of Disguise, and I'll Be Home for Christmas. Don't get me wrong, he's not going to be collecting a statue for Best Original Screenplay anytime soon, but this was decent stuff. I trust his previous work was just to pay the bills/learn the craft.

Taking the General Equity of Deuteronomy 22:8 too far?

You know it's only a matter of time until this kind of 'wisdom' jumps the Pond:

For nearly a quarter of a century, Lourdes Maxwell has celebrated the arrival of summer by putting a paddling pool in the garden.

This year, however, her two grandchildren and the children of her neighbours may have to find another way to cool off in the heat.

Miss Maxwell's local council has decided that the pool - which is only 2ft deep - needs a lifeguard.

The 47-year-old divorced mother of three has also been told she must have insurance before she can inflate the toy outside her house in Portsmouth.

from The Daily Mail.

2:42

Joshua Allen has done the world a service, he's calculated (I'm not exactly positive how) the length of the perfect pop song: Two Minutes and Forty-Two Seconds (note the '42' there. A sure sign he's on to something).

It's a clever, impassioned, vulgar piece that seems exactly right. Perhaps with some thought I could find the flaw in his argument ("Layla", "Freebird" or "Roland the Headless Thompson Gunner" come to mind as counter-examples), however when I read it, I don't really want to try. Particularly when I get to the clincher:

...this song by a group that pretty much defines one-hit wonder: the La’s. The song is "There She Goes," and is so flawless that it instantly made everything else the band did pointless. This ditty is two minutes and 42 seconds, and is all about songwriting economy.

I listened to it and said, in my rich and sonorous timbre, in my typically concise and absolutely-nailing-it fashion: "Here is a song that has everything I need and nothing I don’t."

The main riff acts as the intro. The verses are the chorus. The solo is 100 percent fat-free and leads right into a tidy bridge. And then we’re back where we started. It’s like some ingenious IKEA futon or Japanese love hotel where every component is doing double-duty. When "There She Goes" is over, I guarantee absolutely no one in the room goes: "[expletive deleted] finally."

I’d hit upon the perfect song length. I fist-bumped somebody.

He goes on from there with some stunning supporting evidence--and better yet, a playlist of perfect 2:42 songs.

Towel Day 2008 (observed)

We observed Towel Day on Monday, once again celebrating the author who permanently skewed my mind back in Junior High. Couldn't get things organized enough for a group shot this year, but I was able to snag some individual shots:

oh, yeah, and a little gift from The Love of my Life...

(will try to get a better shot of that soon)

Nice Quote

Think I've read this once or twice before, but when I stumbled upon it today, it struck me as worth dwelling on (besides, if I put it here, I can easily find it for future reference)

It breaks your heart. It is designed to break your heart. The game begins in the spring, when everything else begins again, and it blossoms in the summer, filling the afternoons and evenings, and then as soon as the chill rains come, it stops and leaves you to face the fall alone.

- Bart Giamatti

I'm Not There, but I wish I had been

Today is International Talk Like Bob Dylan Day, and I'm trying to participate some, but to be honest, my Bob Dylan is really my Steven Banks doing Bob Dylan. But hey, bettern' nothing, right?

It starts at about the two-minute mark here (no need to skip ahead to it, the first two minutes is funny anyway):

A More Savage Place Than You Remember

I am, of course, speaking of whatever room they lock C. S. Lewis' novels in with the screenwriters.

Naturally, the fam and I went to Prince Caspian last weekend. Frankly, I'm not that sure how to respond, I had two trains of thought going through my mind as I watched the movie, and they're still pretty much on the same tracks. On the one hand, I thought it was a fun family movie, a good sequel to the first movie. On the other hand...it took so many liberties with the novel, it made Peter Jackson look like a slave to Tolkein's The Two Towers.

On the pro side, you have great performances, wonderful sets, costumes, makeup, etc. Georgie Henley aged a bit faster than she should've (curse these parents, like the Potter kids' folks who care for their children so well), but still sold it. I was still more than content to see Narnia through her eyes. Skandar Keynes stepped up his performance (not that I had much to complain about) and really shined as Edmund. I've probably seen more of Peter Dinklage than almost any other actor this year, and his performance as Trumpkin shows why I'm seeing him everywhere.

The children's reactions when they first return to Narnia, as they figured out where (and when) they are, and what that meant for their friends...great. Wonderful. I also appreciated the exploration of the idea that the Kings and Queens had abandoned Narnia all those years ago.

On the con side...where to begin? It really felt like someone wrote down about half the scenes of the novel on index cards, shuffled them, and then wrote the screenplay. It's really a shame that where LWW was more faithful than most, this film departed so much. Individually considered, I could defend most (not all) of the changes, including some of the new scenes--not unlike the scene with Tumnus and Edward in LWW. But all of them? Nope, sorry.

My biggest beef is, of course, the attack on Miraz's castle (and the rivalry between Peter and Caspian that spurred Peter on). Very uncharacteristic of Peter--and so unnecessary! I'll spare everyone another verse of "Trust the Source Material!" but...gak. What were Adamson et al thinking?!?!

I also would've enjoyed (but didn't expect to see in detail) Aslan and the Queens romping through the countryside awakening the land. In particular, I wanted to see Aslan freeing the children from their schools--knew that was a pipe dream.

Incidentally, outside of the Pevensies, Caspian, and Miraz, I think I heard characters referred to by their names no more than once. Most, including Reepicheep, are never called by their name! It's a minor thing, but it really bugged me. Not just because names like Reepicheep, Trumpkin, Nikabrik, and Doctor Cornelius are fun, but names are important. Also, it's so much easier to discuss films if you can call characters by their names rather than, "You know...that guy with the thing. No, not that guy, the other thing."

A friend called this flick a bastardization. And it is one. But a good one, one I wouldn't mind watching again on DVD (which is a good thing, cuz I know I'll have to see it a few dozen times the week it's released).

(updated and reposted to plug Loyal Reader #3's take, in which she reminds me of some of the things I meant to gripe about)

Yes, Baseball is a Game of Failure, but Come On

Yeah, I've been awfully silent about the Yankees lately, 'cuz what can you say about these guys? "Rock bottom" seems to be the theme this week from the Manager's mouth, blogs, news stories, and now Hank Steinbrenner. There's a few other words that might stick finer point on it than that, but I try to keep from working blue (even when it comes to these pinstripes).

Rock Bottom...swept by the Mets (including one massacre) with the two best pitchers on the team; getting spanked by the O's, yeah, can't get much lower. Until now...I'm reading a bit on the official site and...Hank Steinbrenner's comments today seemed restrained and rational. What twisted world is this? (actually wish he'd come out yesterday and complained bitterly--particularly about Moose, that really seems to help the team win lately)

Let's go Rasner! (yes, I actually said that)

A Sober Warning

Wired.com's Lore Sjöberg provides a greatly needed warning (and then a few more that are helpful). If his words are heeded, we all owe him a great debt of gratitude.

Wonderment

Back in February, I made an appointment with a specialist--which was about 2.5 weeks away from the date I made it. The symptoms went away, and so following medical advice, I canceled.

Symptoms came back a couple of weeks ago, so rescheduled with that specialist. This time it was 1.5 weeks to get in--and I got the impression that was quick.

So I went in Tuesday, and was scheduled for both some diagnostic tests and a follow-up visit on Thursday.

So here's the thought I can't get out of my head: how concerned should I be that they're moving so quickly?

Thought for the Lord's Day #23

From Ref21's blog:

Them that honour me...

Some of today's Scottish newspapers are running a story about our local school's girls' football team. Against all the odds, they beat off older teams from larger schools all over Scotland, to reach the final of a national tournament sponsored by Coca-Cola - only to discover it was scheduled to be held on a Sunday. To not a little disappointment, the decision was taken to pull out of the opportunity to win the national tournament because of the religious convictions of our community.

read the rest of Iain D Campbell's post here.

Wonderful Timing

This Little League season as been uncharacteristically cold, this week it almost got up to where it should've been weeks ago. Thursday was the warmest day yet, and where was I come game time?

At home with a fever and 18 hours of non-stop sneezing.

Perfect. Juuuust perfect.

I hope to get back to regularly scheduled stuff soon.

Playing the Carter Card

I keep reading about how Sen. Clinton is attacking Sen. Obama like a Republican would, which is one of the many reasons she should prove she's a good Democrat and drop out. I don't know about that. But I am pretty sure Clinton wouldn't put out this ad.

An Episode that Made Me Miss the WGA Strike

While Scrubs has a tendency to be uneven in quality--particularly over the last two seasons, I honestly never thought I'd say I saw an episode I didn't like. A few I was disappointed with, a few I was "meh" about. But flat-out bad? Nahhh, not those guys.

Boy, was I wrong. Just finished "My Princess," the 7th season finale/NBC finale. Wow. Wow. Wow. Was that a stinker! If you haven't seen it yet, watch it up until the first joke about The Todd (00:45 on my timer) and then stop it--delete it from your DVR, close your hulu.com window, etc. Because that's the end of the comedy on that one.

The supposed 'homage' to The Princess Bride contained one real reference to the movie other than most of the story being framed as a bedtime story Dr. Cox was telling Jack. Other than that, it was more of a fairy tale homage. Oh, and a totally pointless one, too.

NBC, for reasons unknown (conspiracy theories about NBC trying to kill audience good will for the show before it's move to ABC abound), aired this out of sequence--so Kelso shows up as Chief of Medicine very early on, which made me (and, from what I read online, several others) think I was watching a re-run instead of a new episode. The time references to JD and Elliot's most recent 'bout of almost getting back together were also out of sequence and contradictory.

In short, this thing was a giant mess. I'm now more than ever looking forward to the ABC episodes, because this show shouldn't go out this way, it deserves so much more.

It was a fairly funny The Todd joke, tho.

West Winging It

In my ongoing effort to stay awake during the wee small hours of the morning when there's nothing to do but make sure that sleeping teenagers are sleeping, I've started re-watching The West Wing, thanks in no small part to it being one of the few series that the library has a complete set of.

Like Sports Night before it, I just love listening to these people talk--I could watch this show every moment I'm awake and be perfectly content (particularly the early seasons).

There are, however, a few problems with the show, and as I go through the DVD's I'll mention a few of them here. Not talking necc. about internal problems (tho they are there) but thinking of it's effect on the culture as a whole.

First and foremost, The West Wing was very, very good at selling it's "The Government is our Savior" message. See, for example, the State of the Union episodes in Season 1 where Toby rebels against the idea of saying that the end of Big Government is here. No, what we need is a bigger government!

Even worse, actually, is how smart, convicted and passionate all the characters are. Too many viewers think that it reflects reality, the show feels real, people in Washington must be like that, too. Sorkin characters are always smart and passionate people of conviction. Not everyone in the government is that smart, convicted and passionate. Period. Just impossible. No human being can maintain that level of passion for that long. Nor are there that many people of conviction in Washington--for long, anyway. As for smart? No human is as smart as an Aaron Sorkin character--Sorkin isn't as smart as one of his characters (no way would Leo, Toby, Sam, Josh, Donna, Will, Danny [Rydell, Concannon or Tripp], Casey, Jeremy, Dana, or Natalie would come up with a show about a comedy series that didn't feature...funny things).

Mother's Day Weekend

Around here, we observed Mother's Day yesterday--I presented TLomL with a stunning diamond necklace, followed up with a group gift of a croquet set--which Samwise almost has enough patience to play, it turns out. The rest of us spent some good quality time knocking the balls around before the afternoon got too hot. I tried to make one of her favorite Chinese dishes for dinner, the results were definitely...edible (I think I learned enough that my next attempt will be tasty as well). Thankfully, there's a cheap pizza place nearby :)

Today, almost by accident, we saw both of our mothers and my two grandmothers. One grandmother's health is pretty shaky, this could very well be the last time we saw her. Frankly, I was pretty much a mess leading up to the visit. But we all had a really good time, the visit did me a lot of good--and inexplicably, her, too.

Reminiscing

Frazz basically sums things up for me...

A Classical Education

Spent today either in a tremendously deep sleep or in really horrible pain. Was able to find a little relief through the magic of destraction via youtube. Whilst doing so, the idea occurred to me to pull up this classic and introduce it to my kids. They didn't erupt in howls of laughter (clearly, mine aren't the only genes in them), but they did find it funny. How many things on SNL and the like today will be funny 50 years from now? Maybe I should be asking how many of those comedy bits in 50 years will be able to distract from Kidney Stone pain? That's the real test, isn't it?

Finally, a happy ending

Tho quite honestly, at this point, I'm just happy there's any ending.

One month after getting rear-ended by a questionably insured dimwit in my then three-weeks old van, we got it back. Thankfully, we can now return my aunt's 1982 Chevy "Who Needs a Humvee to Leave a Carbon Footprint?" Van. It was so nice to drive our Caravan again--the visibility alone made me feel like a kid again.

That may be the most in-depth post you're getting out of me for a few days (and yes, I realize fully how non-deep that was), a family crisis may be on the horizon.

This is a musical trend I can get behind...

They Might Be Giants just put out their second album of children's music, and now BNL just released one (hopefully their first)...stuff my kids want to listen to that I can enjoy, too.

Now if I could only get Linkin Park and Alanis to do the same, think we'd be all set...

Don't click this link too close to bedtime

Nightmares will ensue if you do.

Kim Riddlebarger, URC pastor, notorious amillennialist and Yankee fan (2 out of 3 ain't bad), linked today to Worst album cover ever? from South Florida Sun-Sentinal's site. Some of this stuff is truly horrific. Best case for using iTunes (or the like) exclusively is that cover art like this won't be laying around for impressionable young children to find and suffer the emotional damage.

radio.blog update - Shuffle-riffic

You ever have one of those times when iTunes' shuffle feature seems to have a mind of its own, and is either picking just the right songs to fit your mood? (or all that are absolutely wrong) Feels like there's somebody, somewhere that deserves a 17% tip.

Had one of those times today, and since it's been awhile since I updated the radio.blog, figured I'd grab the first few songs of the day (with some minor editing, to be honest) et viola...

Obvioiusly, no real theme to these...other than "Songs that'd sound just awful recorded by Linda Ronstadt (even tho' she did record at least one of them)" alternatively, "Songs that David Archuleta would butcher."

Fantasy Advice

My generation spoiled everything for you. It has always been the special prerogative of young people to look and act weird and shock grown-ups. But my generation exhausted the Earth's resources of the weird. Weird clothes -- we wore them. Weird beards -- we grew them. Weird words and phrases -- we said them. So, when it came your turn to be original and look and act weird, all you had left was to tattoo your faces and pierce your tongues. Ouch. That must have hurt. I apologize. - P.J. O'Rourke

It's graduation season, which means it's time for newspaper columnists to do their annual "Imaginary Commencement Address" columns--many of which are worth reading a good fifth of. One or two a year, however, are actually worth the money spent on the ink--or, increasingly the bits of server space they take.

I haven't been subjected to many of these yet this year, but I'm willing to bet that P.J. O'Rourke's is about as good as you're going to get this year, very likely the best of the batch.

Which means, naturally, that no educational institution in this nation would let him give it. In brief, if you want to have a good life and make a postive difference in the world: get a job, make money, stay out of politics, be thankful life isn't fair, and read your Bible (not for the reason normally given). But he puts it so much better.

Why the Silence?

No stranger to controversy, politics (local or otherwise), and desperately in need of a fresh blog post, why has Polymathis remained silent about this AP story?

DENVER — A Denver man who wants the city to be prepared for space aliens is proposing a commission to deal with the matter.

The assistant city attorney says he doesn't know what officials will ask about Jeff Peckman's proposal during next week's "review and comment" meeting.

Peckman says an 18-member commission would form a strategy "dealing with issues related to the presence of extraterrestrial beings on Earth."

The 54-year-old Peckman also needs 4,000 signatures to get his proposal on the November ballot.

Just got back from Iron Man

no time/inclination to say much right now, been one of those days.

In brief, this movie rocked. Good summer flick, good action flick, great comic book flick. Don't think I have one real complaint...maybe a quibble or two, but that's for another time.

In honor of the director, let me rephrase that brief statement: it was so money, baby.

Must.See.

And if you have any comic geekitude in you at all--stay til after the credits.

Speaking of good ol J. I. . . .

After talking briefly about Packer's decision the other day, I've been thinking of the monumental way his work shaped my thinking years ago. There was a time that my reading list consisted of "things Packer wrote or endorsed." Sadly, haven't really read him in years (still give his books out as recommendations and/or gifts, tho). His Knowing God and A Quest for Godliness were life-altering. Keep in Step with the Spirit, Growing in Christ, Hot Tub Religion, Rediscovering Holiness were all very helpful (I know I'm leaving titles out...this is all off the top of my head here)--I found Evangelism and the Sovereignty of God disappointing, but I've always chalked that up to having heard several people tell me about the book before I got to it--basically reading it myself was a review.

And you can't talk about Packer's writing without mentioning his monumental introductory essay to John Owen's The Death of Death in the Death of Christ. It really impressed me when I read its reprint in A Quest for Godliness, but I distinctly remember being floored by it a few months later when I read it as I started Owen's work.

Too often overlooked, I think, is the essay penned by Packer and O. R. Johnston introducing their translation of Luther's The Bondage of the Will. I've been trying to find an electronic copy of that over the last few days (my copy of Luther is in a box somewhere), but have thus far been unable to. That's a shame--it's not on the level of his Owen essay, but it's within spitting distance. Now, I know all too well that even the mighty Google (all hail our coming electronic masters) lets something fall through the cracks--and sites like monergism.com miss things too. If any of you readers know where there is a copy of the Luther essay online, please leave the address in the comments below.

If you haven't yet taken the time to read Packer...time to fix that, folks. He's one of the best things that the 20th century produced.

Ew! So glad I finished breakfast before I read this...

from BBC News

Consumer group Which? said tests at its London offices found equipment carrying bugs that could cause food poisoning.

Out of 33 keyboards swabbed, four were regarded as a potential health hazard and one harboured five times more germs than one of the office's toilet seats.

Microbiologist Dr Peter Wilson said a keyboard was often "a reflection of what is in your nose and in your gut".

During the Which? tests in January this year, a microbiologist deemed one of the office's keyboards to be so dirty he ordered it to be removed, quarantined and cleaned.

"What is in your nose and in your gut." Great line.

I need to go wash my hands for a few hours now...